Tuesday, December 16, 2008

Parenthood, Part Fourteen

Of course nothing with me is ever simple.

Shannon still had no idea what was going on with us, however, I had finally caved in and told another very good friend. Ironically Jo and her husband had gotten married exactly one month after Ted and I, and she got pregnant within a few months. In fact, she had had a second child and was due to deliver her third child in early July of 1986.

When they called from the hospital on the evening of July 3 to tell us that their son had been born healthy, we were ecstatic for them. I told her that I would be over to see her the next day. She told me that she would completely understand if I didn't feel like I could handle it, and would rather wait until they were home before seeing the baby. I thanked her for that, but I knew I could do it.

They had three gorgeous children and we were very happy for them. We knew that our turn would come. Everything was going to work out just fine.

During the first week in August we found out that I was pregnant. Again. But this time was different. Although excited, I felt a calmness about all of it.

Dr. D had me use progesterone suppositories both morning and night to counteract my luteal phase defect. He did an ultrasound immediately and saw everything he expected to see. He told me that I was indeed pregnant and he was going to do everything in his power to keep me that way.

And oh yes...my due date? April Fools Day 1987.

I knew that it was going to work out. Not only were my prayers answered, but I was feeling differently than I had with the previous pregnancies. I was nauseous. Miserably so.

During August I would eat tomatoes and cucumbers and corn on the cob a LOT. There's nothing like fresh home grown vegetables and I took advantage of them. Well...not that August. The idea of putting those things anywhere near my stomach was gut-wrenching. It wasn't going to happen.

I had to quit cleaning the bathroom. It made me sick to my stomach. Ted took that job over. Going to the grocery store and seeing raw meat was another thing that pretty much did me in.

Dr. D saw me every two weeks and assured me that things were going well. When we hit the 12 week mark, he told me that he wanted me to continue with the progesterone for another two weeks. By this time I was starting to feel a little better, but I did NOT want to give up the progesterone. I felt as though it was the baby's lifeline and I just couldn't take it away. Dr. D assured me that it would be fine. He even showed me research to prove it. Reluctantly I stopped using it.

And things were good.

At 15 weeks another ultrasound showed that things were just great with the baby. We finally decided that it was time to go public. Although my parents knew, no one else did.

We had just gotten the news that my uncle (my mom's brother) had suffered a heart attack. Although it wasn't extremely serious, he was in a hospital near his home almost an hour away. My mom and I went to see him. While we were there, my aunt (his wife) and my grandma (his and my mom's mother) were there too. After visiting for a while we went back to my aunt and uncle's house. Although the timing was not great, I decided to tell my aunt and grandma that I was pregnant. I told them that at the time, it was all about my uncle, but I didn't think I would be able to hide being pregnant much longer.

This baby was going to be my grandma's first great grandchild. I was anxious to see her reaction. She looked at me, pointed her finger at me and said, "You make sure you talk to that baby. Understand?" And then she smiled. I knew she was happy. I gave her and my aunt a very brief history of what we'd gone through. I wanted them to know that this was not something that we were taking for granted and that we welcomed it with open arms.

That night it was time to tell Shannon.

I was a nervous wreck.

I sat on the bed and wrote out all I was going to say before I called her.

Then I dialed the phone.

She took it extremely well. I told her that I hope she understood why I didn't tell her about anything that had gone on before, that I didn't want to burden her with all the issues we were dealing with while they were dealing with their own issues. She said she completely understood.

Whew. What a relief to be out in the open.

To be continued...


The Arthur Clan said...

I think it's wonderful that you can remember all these little details as you write your story. I have such a terrible memory...I wish that I had written things down while they were happening. (Best laid plans and all...)

PERBS said...

Wonderful news for you both! BTW, April 1 is not bad for a due date. . . that is my baptismal day!!!!!!!