Sunday, January 20, 2008

My Dateless Sons

This was taken in Myrtle Beach, SC, when Alex was 8 and Joey was 12.

I don't know what the problem is, but neither of my sons has EVER been on a date!

Joey is 20 and he is an old fashioned soul deep down inside. He thinks that Archie Bunker from All in the Family is absolutely right about everything. (I have NO idea where he got that!!) Anyway, I think that he is so afraid of rejection that he won't ask a girl out. He's never had a circle of friends, because he hasn't found other guys who have the same interests that he has. Can we say "lack of compromise" here??? He's so set in his ways that he gets upset when people don't see things his way. Yes, he can drive us crazy at times, but he has many good qualities too. He's a hard worker, he's very dedicated to what he decides is important. He's a good looking guy too. He never went to a high school dance, and whenever I mentioned "PROM" to him, he just cringed and said, "MOTHER!" I really do think that he's terribly afraid of asking a girl out and her saying "no" and that is what is keeping him from doing that. If I ask him if there are any nice girls in any of his classes, he tells me that he doesn't even look at them and he's taking classes for an education, that's all.

Alex is 17 and has not been on a date either. His personality is soooooooo different and I think we might be making a teeny weeny bit of progress with him. At least he is no longer having a royal FIT when I mention "PROM" to him. He just simply says, " I ain't going." (He says "ain't" because he knows that I can't stand it!) I told him that we're forming a team to get him a prom date. As you can imagine, he's not too excited about that. There are several potential prom dates in mind, only these girls don't know it yet, hahaha! He would be a great date...he's got a real sense of humor, and is very good-hearted.

They obviously inherited their lack of confidence in dating from their father...I'll explain that in my next post.

In the meantime, I'm going to keep working on Joey having his first date and Alex having his first date AND having a prom date!

I think I've got my work cut out for me!

This was taken this past October as Alex was turning 17 and Joey was 20.


Anonymous said...

Cindi dear, this is all your fault, you know that don't you. These two handsome boys have had a very strong mother who not only has taken great care of them but has managed to have a loving home and even through adversity they have seen their parents take care of eachother through surgeries and building a new house,etc. These boys are looking for the "right" one not cheap imitations to fill time with. They will measure every girl up to you and Ted's relationship. Plus they are not in a hurry to leave a great home and great parents. Trust me you would be complaining constantly if they had a girlfriend who was taking time away from their family or who didn't measure up. As much as you want them to date it could be worse, they could be involved with something that is not good for them. My son has had a tough time, he doesn't understand why he can't find a girlfriend who is a good friend that he can do things with, both his sisters have had the same boyfriends since Jr. Hi and they are best friends and will probably marry (Alyse already told her boyfriend "not yet" when he asked her to marry him, she said ask her again after they graduate from college) but poor Ty has had a couple of "girlfriends" but they went all psycho on him and the girls play so many games that it hurt his head and broke his heart. My hubby gave him great advice, just wait and let it happen, if you are dating a girl and it isn't fun then get out of it because you want to be with someone you love being with and have fun with,not someone who whines or makes you miserable. He related all his girlfriend horror stories and then told him that I didn't come into his life until he was 25 and he knew it was the right one immediately. So Cindi don't stress so much, just think I got two letters over the holidays from gals with high school sons announcing they are grandmothers because the boys got girls pregnant after prom. Not the way I want to be a grandmother, how about you? Love laughing with you...Ter

Paulie said...

Out of my three kids only the middle one is married. I doubt the oldest son or my youngest daughter will ever marry. heck one of my grand daughters is now married. Of course, son adopted her when she was three.

Paulie said...

Ps forgot to say -- you have a couple of good lookin' guys!